Sunday, 4 March 2012

YOUR FRIENDS CAN'T PICK YOUR FUTURE FOR YOU

THIS DOES NOT APPLY TO ANYONE THAT IS IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP.

Okay so most girls have friends that are always there for them, advise them when needed and are generally good people to be around when upset and stuff. Friends are great and they should be there for that purpose, but your friends are not bloody prophets that know exactly what’s right for YOU. And if I’m honest, most of the time they are wrong. I’m talking specifically in terms of relationships. When a girl gets hurt, she usually turns to her friends for some guidance and some friends give good advice e.g. 'Do what makes you happy.' 'Have you tried looking at it from this angle?' 'Perhaps you need to just give it some time.' – You know, general shit like that. And then you get other friends coming with shit like ‘My girl, you need to fix up. Crying over man aint gonna do shit.’ ‘He’s a wasteman anyway’ ‘Just leave him, you can do better’. Believe me, no girl that has genuinely STRONG feelings for a guy is going to listen to that kind of bullshit.  

Although the friend probably means well, what they don’t realise is that they’re not really helping the matter. Most girls when advising their friend, forget to put themselves in that position and judge as the friend rather than empathising and being understanding of how much this guy means to her, how happy he makes her and how much they’re in love – if that. It’s easy for you to say ‘fuck him and move on’ but to actually do that is possibly one of the hardest things a girl can do. And to be honest, why should she have to? If your friend, who you love, is really happy in this relationship and can see a future with this guy – not to be rude but who the fuck are you to tell her to not go back to him. Don’t give me that shit about ‘if he loves you, he wouldn’t hurt you’, disney channel has deceived you. If you still think that then you’re living in a bubble or you haven’t been in a serious relationship. No relationship is perfect, and neither is a human being. EVERYONE will hurt you at one point, maybe not intentionally but they will and they do. It’s up to you to decide what your limit is. Your friend can’t decide for you simply because they don’t know what you’ve been through. They’re NOT in the relationship with you.

So girls, if you have that good guy (he may have some flaws but he’s good enough for you) and there comes a point where he may have hurt you, it’s up to YOU to decide whether you can work on it. Your friends are there to support you through it and be there even if they were right all along – that he was just a dickhead. You can’t live your life going by other people’s opinions and inputs because while they are probably getting on with their life, you’re gonna be stuck there – miserable and lonely. 
You make your own mistakes and learn from them, because at least then you don’t have anyone else to blame but yourself

@_EBJA

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